2022
As an introduction to this blog i will start by saying that i'm pretty sure that in a previous blog i mentioned the fact that i was in my car one morning, on my way to work, whereby i was stopped at some traffic lights, listening to a local radio station (Radio Piccadilly possibly), whereby the DJ was telling all its listeners about how much certain 'A listers' were earning per hour(???)/minute(???) ...
Something that then led me to think about what position i would hold within the company i worked at if i simply doubled my salary - and about the extra responsibilities such a position would entail...
I realised, for instance, that i would be able to take more expensive/luxurious holidays - but that because of the extra stress that such extra responsibilities would no doubt bring, i would probably be destressing during most of the time spent holidaying - only to return to work some two weeks later for such stress to start accumulating once again...
Such increased income would probably result in me upgrading my car and home etc - and this would then tie me into regular/monthly repayment schedules - and that this, in turn, would then make me even more of a slave to the monthly payment cheques...
Such a train of thought caused me to feel pretty miserable - which then painted a picture of such 'advances' in life being akin to travelling down a cylindrical cone, whereby the length of such a cone represented increases in salary, and the diminishing width of such a cone represented my diminished sense of freedom / increased responsibilities...
It was at such a point that the 'there's got to be more to life than this, surely' thought came into my mind...
And then, whilst travelling past the same spot, but in the opposite direction, whilst returning home that same day, i got a much better feel of what the phrase 'rat race' really meant - for me at least - many thanks to whatever the radio station was that i found myself to be listening to that morning...
So, what on Earth does all that have to do with dealing with hindrances, the reader of these words may quite reasonably ask...
Well, to cut a, perhaps, long story short, around six months later i was made redundant - resulting in a newly discovered sense of freedom - until about two years further down the line, when my redundancy money ran out, and the fruits of my self-employment efforts lay barren upon the ground...
So anyway, walking to the job centre one day, during one of my many two-weekly signing on sessions, i suddenly realised that i had been busy with anger issues playing themselves out inside my head - and further realising that i couldn't recollect having walked most of my journey - and that all that had been playing itself out inside my head were simply imaginary scenarios...
You see i had hoped that self-employment would be the answer to maintaining, and possibly increasing, my sense of freedom - but nothing had fallen into place, and i couldn't understand why such a fundamental change had taken place - before then things had generally fallen into place...
Little did i know that 'Them Upstairs', or 'the Universe' if you will, were/was simply preparing me to understand that, yes, there is indeed more to life than being a slave to the monthly pay cheque...
But hey, the two years had been good - if only comparatively speaking...
But they had led to all this anger and frustration developing within me - a growing sense of hopelessness really...
So anyway, the sudden realisation that i had been so busy/occupied inside my head that i couldn't remember how i had got to where i then found myself to be walking, upon my journey to the job centre, came as a bit of a shock to me - i had obviously crossed roads, and taken turns down different ones - but i simply had no recollection of having done so...
So anyway, i then realised that such periods of preoccupied thought processes had become increasingly habitual - and that maybe it would be a good idea if i became aware of such mental preoccupations earlier - if only not to remain a seeming slave to them...
And, surely enough, this then led me to become aware of them more regularly - and to snap back into reality - and, who knows, maybe to possibly start enjoying at least part of the walk, to and frompt job centre for example...
At first, such regular realisations of such inner anger scenarios playing themselves out inside my head caused me to become angry with them - causing me to see them as the enemy, and doing battle with them - resulting in me always becoming exhausted and getting my ass kicked...
Baaad tactic, i then realised - i'm simply empowering them by feeding them with more energy...
So then, upon each occasion of realising such thoughts were playing out inside my head, i simply stopped continuing to feed it all with energy - effortlessly - simply by disconnecting/non-attaching from/to such mental preoccupations...
...Again and again - time after time - until its energy began receding...
...Simply being aware of the folly of engaging it in battle...
I saw it all as a glass, containing liquid, with a straw in it - and that i had a choice - simply stop sucking up the liquid through the straw...
Effortless non-attachment - it was simply a choice - an ongoing series of such choices in actual fact...
And surely enough i started becoming aware of such mental preoccupations earlier and earlier - until the time came when i could catch them upon their arising into my conscious mind - twas as simple as that really...
Just a continual letting go - and no more than that - time after time after time...
It was simply a choice not to partake of the liquid, through the straw - once i realised that i had been doing so of course - phew...
Simply feed it with less and less energy - but without seeing it as an enemy to do battle with, or with resentment for example - nope, definitely not that route...
...Unless you want your ass kicked every time of course - eventually at least...
...Such was my experience anyway...
I was later to realise that Buddhism referred to it as one of the three roots...
Hence me later realising that such a 'journey through the wilderness' could simply be seen as preparation for my later journey through Buddhism...
Which was perhaps why i found myself to be drawn to it so easily...
I had already been unknowingly walking part of the Path...
So does it work for more than just anger issues???...
To which i would answer, if you wish it to i guess...
It has done for me - whenever i have wished it to anyway...
Give it a try and see how it goes for you, if you feel the need to, or simply wish to, of course...
Such is/being the nature of free-will choices after all...
(https://www.ourquantumparticulates.org/videos/dealing-with-hindrances)